If you voted for Chimpie and you're between the ages of 18 and 39, then your country needs you right now! I won't quibble about which branch of the service you choose, unlike Jesus' General who thinks you all should join the infantry, but you do need to sign up.
Yes, I know Chimpie is your hero, but just because he deserted his post in Alabama doesn't mean it's right. Get your ass down to the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine, or Coast Guard recruiter right this minute, or you forever forfeit your right to claim to be a patriot. Real patriots aren't afraid to lay their own lives on the line, unlike your current heroes, for example, Dick "I had other priorities" Cheney, Tom "the minorities had all slots" DeLay, and Rush "What do you mean you can't tell where my anal cyst ends and I begin?" Limbaugh.
And yes, I'm a vet, assholes, 1971-74, so my money is where my mouth is. Trust me, you will make those recruiters so very happy and you'll get to play with the latest in weaponry and maybe even kill some non-Christians! Doesn't that make your little soldier stand at attention?
1 comment:
Have you seen Nascar-driving, shotgun-toting Jesus on Conan?
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