Thursday, June 23, 2005

Alternative Service for Republican Warriors

All right, I know that despite your tough talk, some of you are frightened little squirrels, so I want to give all of you Young Republicans and College Republicans who just can't bring yourselves to tangibly contribute to the Global War on Terror by actually signing up for the military a different option: Just take a one-month vacation to Iraq outside the so-called "Green Zone." You don't have to go through basic training, or advanced infantry training, don't have to get your head shaved, don't have to wear fatigues or obey orders. Just take a 30-day tour of Iraq. Based on Dick Cheney's knowing affirmation of the last throes of the insurgency, by the time you get there, it should be the great undiscovered cool locale for swinging right-wingers. Be a trendsetter!

Your president is triumphal in his optimism, and it is more than two years since "Mission Accomplished," so you should book now to get the exit row seat. You can make reservations at Air Gorilla.

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