Why Some People Shouldn't Do Drugs

The Hillbilly Heroin Homeboy hits one out the park! Those Democrats--so diabolical that they set up a ten-year sting operation to get Republican Mark Foley to troll for teenage boys.

Of course, there's another Republican theory on the talking points list too--that Mark Foley was in deep cover as a Democratic plant, set to embarrass them at just this moment.

Of course, applying Occam's Razor to this outrage, it would appear to simply be that Mark Foley--REPUBLICAN--is just a creepy old man with no regard for age-of-consent laws or power differentials in working relationships.

Your First Amendment Rights...

...as interpreted by your Vice President's office. You see, he is a dictator, immune from any contradictory comments. Mr. Howardss fuckup was that he didn't say "reprehensible" to Chimpie the Hand Puppet. The Chimperor would have taken it as a compliment, slapped Howards on the back, and said, "We'll repre-insulate those evildoers and killers over there so we won't have to repro-masturbate them over here."